i visited my friend's blog today and found out she spent the weekend at boracay. i felt happy then bitchy then sad. all in the minute or 2 that it took me to finish reading her most current posts.


i'm happy that she is getting out more often. she seems to be doing well. i'm glad that she is beginning to live and enjoy life. god knows she how hard the past years had been for her. it's time that she experience the good life and i'm trult happy for her. but i can't help but feel cheated and sad. i guess it's bacause i've always thought that we'll be going to fabulous places together. me, her, and another close friend that we have. i have always been invited to go to all sorts of beaches and hang outs by my office friends but i would always decline. i didn't want to go to some beach and be with them, all the while wishing i was with my best friends instead. i always told i'll be going to all these beaches and bars and discos with 2 of the most important people in my life. so it was ok if i missed it. in the end, it was not meant to be. oh well. *sigh*


i know it's wrong for me to bitch about her going to a beatiful place and having fun. none of this is her fault. she didn't tell me to miss out on all those company gimmicks. it was wrong for me to expect anything. in all my wisdom, i failed to remember that things don't happen the way we want them to. i'll keep that in my mind from now on.