the first is always the beginning...

july 7 i celebrated my first year anniversary with DK. i have reached a milestone... =D... and all of my friends agree. most of them could hardly believe i was able to be attached to a person this long and not grow bored with him. yep... definitely a milestone.

last week has been all fun and i certainly don't want any rain on my parade but i noticed something sunday night as i was having dinner with my beloved beau. i was getting more and more anxious about his casual treatment on the matter of birth control and why i had to raise this specific issue during dinner i don't know. but i had already blurted it out so... he merely looked at me, shrugged, then tried to shift my attention to the sandwich he was chowing down. his apparent lack of interest on how we should take on contraception is alarming. i know i said once that i would love to have his kid... but i didn't mean now.

why is it that men always seem to rely on the women to take care of contraception? it's irritating how they would blab about not wanting to have a child now then have "unsafe sex" minutes later. contraception should be a couple's responsibility. not just the woman's.

sometimes i find myself wishing i had never given in to my wants despite the fact that i have absolutely no regrets. though nothing could compare to the pleasure that i find in his lovemaking i should have been content with doing everything but the girl. but i have been too weak to deny the call of the flesh. no matter how i wish it, we can no longer go back to just holding hands...