*sigh*. some days, it is so difficult to love you. god only knows why i put up with it all... why i've put up with all our issues for 4 years now... god only knows why, despite our arguments, insecurities, issues, i've agreed to marry you.

i want to regret decisions i have made... but like you, i think regrets are only for losers and fools. and i am neither. to regret decisions i have made is short of saying i have never been happy with you and that i was wrong in choosing to be with you. that wouldn't be fair and true because i am happy to be with you when you're not being an ass like these days...

maybe i'm just tired... tired of cooking, cleaning, washing... i'm tired of waiting on you all the time... i'm tired of seeing you treat your friends like royalty while you just watch me slave away doing household chores. some days, i am so tired i could just fall dead. but it doesn't seem to matter to you... i don't think you even notice...

i'm fed up and i want to leave... and what do you do? you send me messages like that qoute. you turn all sweet and attentive, doing this and that for me. when i give you the cold shoulder, you pout like the big baby that you are and look hurt. you say that i always make you feel like you don't do anything right. well... you always make me feel taken for granted. and i have had enough of this vicious cycle.