i went to the bank yesterday to encash a check. the bank required 3 IDs and i only had two on me when i got there so i went back to my place. i went upstairs, took out my big envelope of "important stuff" and rummaged for my new NBI clearance. i found it... right next to nhell's picture.


i took out the picture and stared at nhell's face long and hard. just like before, each time i came across something that reminded me of him - a picture, a place, a song - a thousand what if's and what could have been's floated thru my head. we could have made it. we could have worked it out. he's a good guy... he really is. he sings real well too. he's also one hell of a great kisser. yeah. no doubt about it. i'm no kiss and tell but i just have to say, this guy's real good at locking lips with a girl. he made me want him real bad.


but keith, although not as good as nhell in the smooching department, far exceeds him in making someone want something. the first time we ever kissed, i not only wanted keith real bad... keith made me want him with me for life.


having come to that conclusion, i sighed. i tore up all of nhell's photos into little bits and threw them in the trash can. no more reminiscing. no more thinking of what might have been and what could have been. my sould has found what it was looking for.